Motivation.

So in my failed attempt of doing work which is three days overdue, I shall blog about my current state.

I think I lack motivation, to wake up, to do things, to even go out, just step over the bed and take a shower and get some sun. My motivation are in the lights of nocturnal activities and a heavy load of cash outflow. Damned. What the hell have I done to myself.

I keep delaying my work, I can't even get my brain to function 3 hours straight to write and shoot and edit and read freaking research articles. I'm not falling off the wagon, I've seriously missed the three wagons that were willing to take me back on board.

My intense heartbreak period has seriously left me numb by all emotions and feelings people could portray, share, give or take. All I care about is what I want to do in the moment. I'm screwing my life long plans and my future.

On this road, I'm really disappointing a lot of people. I want to run away and start over if I could.

I have a million things to do, with enough time, but I don't do it.

I've changed too much.

<3 Mstrkrft addict for now.