esymai: learn to #bun. I Heart you Sophia Chang.

esymai:

learn to #bun.

I Heart you Sophia Chang.

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Cameover

Tattered, shattered afloat,

When you walk into this empty abode,

Decorated, paintings rose,

An artful sight, a life composed

Brave, bewildered by age,

When you walk in through these empty gates,

A desire to build, last conquest lay dead,

Envision the day life brings ahead

When tattered rest same,

When courage finds fame,

When defying the difinitive,

Becomes vindicted,

Becomes a game,

That bares down no shame,

Finds imperative,

In times neglected.

Kicks and Colors.

I just find how bizarre it is that sneaker companies can add almost any verb, noun or adjective in front of a color and make it exclusive. I mean - not that I'm disrespecting any, I too fall under those somehow inclined to editions with "Atomic Mangos" (Lime Green, Mango Orange & Whites) or say, "Laneys" (Blue and Yellow AJs) or some sizzling "Fire Red". 

...but I still find it amazing they manipulate us that way.

xx

Taking the world, a glass full.

Ever thought that the theory perceiving things 'a glass full or a glass half full' could actually be slightly wrong about an optimistic person or the latter, a pessimistic one. 

I was pouring water into my glass the other day and I stopped after just a half's full. Then i thought to myself, "what's so pessimistic about this?"

I knew I couldn't finish it anyways. I was simply being careful, aware and cautious. 

Although, pessimists are always a dampener and perhaps because they choose to lead a way that is the opposite of being anywhere near a carefree one. 

Then there must be a term for those who are in between. Too lazy to care and too scared to risk it all. A glass of coffee. Nope, not in a mug.

....and I love coffee.

Blankside.

Catching a drift while we stare at the blankside of the moon,

Weeping slowly to the things i'm about to tell you,

Calling a rewind but the pause is forcing the move,

Silently waking, reversing these words to come through. 

If my heart could make up the thoughts that passes through,

If my heart could make up the words i'll paragraph too.

If the heart could speak to you louder than these lines,

I'll definitely leave the heart to beat just fine. 

Behind.

Have you ever tried to feel the numbness,

Apart from fixing the falling apart,

You stay in waiting and race the clock,

But you find that you're dreaming. 

Do you hope to be free from thoughts? 

Or do you laugh in silence. 

When nobody is looking you shut your eyes,

Crying. 

#WhatINotedOn February Eighteenth.

Live by this quote.

Life is about always making mistakes, sometimes you regret but sometimes you know that mistakes are necessary. And you are always going to make, more or less the same mistakes along the way. And it is what you do in between those mistakes are the most precious times and valuable memories and worthy experiences.

...no, the cat has no mistakes. 

Just reasons to fall head-over-heels in love with Clash of Clan.

HAHA!

You must had thought this would be a sappy, mopey, cheesy one right?

Fret not, won't bore you with my love stories today but only on a more gripping kind of love, Clash of Clan.

#longlivebarbarianking #offtowarneedmesometroops

Strategy games never really were my thing on the computer or past consoles. Thought that the lengthy wait and sitting and planning and organizing and oh God, the choosing of warriors to the selection of wars. It seemed a bit too boyish for me. So, i retracted to my GTA, Tomb Raider, whatever-zombie-games that were more entertaining. Till I met Clash of Clan on the iOS. and that was that. A few-30 weeks later I'm killing it with my Town Hall Level 8 and Level 62-ing. To those who are playing and have gotten levels above me inclusive of your walls and troops all either purple or black by now, SHUT UP. I'm not competitive, really....

It's super cute. 

Seriously. Supercell's graphic are more than anything adorable. The barbarians and the giants look somewhat cuddly. The archer girls are fearsome tiny little warriors but at Level 4 and above, they're not fearless, fearsome and ferocious. Still. So. Adorable. Especially when they die, they poof and make dying sounds which we can almost sort of empathize with. I'll prove it to you in Clash of Clan's TV Trailer!




After Heal Fairies you'll get Dragons, Valkyrie, Hogriders, Minions, Pekka Knights & other awesome mystical warriors.
I'm an ancient-anything junkie. From ancient histories, war and cultures to geographical differences, I love the ancient documentation. 

It is smart.
Well, I feel smart playing it at the very least. I guess strategy games are supposed to be that, smart and a challenge to your IQ and your time managing skills. Why time management you say? Because being time-savvy is to choose your troops according to your strategy at that time wisely. Being time-savvy is also knowing how to train your troops and balance the production rate. Being time-savvy is also knowing what to upgrade first before you think leveling up your HQ was a great idea. Till you realize the multiplayer battles increases with Town Hall Levels as well. It is also knowing how to sacrifice your diamonds, golds and elixirs for the betterment of your future village. Putting your favorite troops at R&D always helps make future playing times, better. And it keeps less elixirs for others to steal. BEING TIME or COST SAVVY is also knowing whether you are strong enough to break your shield all the time and let others steal your loot. Nah-uh-uh. So, Yes. At least, I know those 12 year old boys in Clan conversations will learn some future planning and time management skills. 

They even have genius websites like Clash of Clan Builder, which guides you on best village strategies. Cheat! but WIN!

It's idiot-proof.
Of course, I just mentioned all the intricacies of the game but from the beginning what hooked me most was how visual, simple and easy to identify it was. Most iOS strategy games can be just confusing. Sometimes they're not even in English. This is the same on Android Platforms as well. Not sure how true this is but heard that Android had more popular non-English games like COC. For Strategy game junkies, be my guest and have an account for all that's hyped right now in the geekery world but for people like me who just love to test their IQ once a day by checking my cute yet fully armed village, Clash of Clan is the answer.

They're a bunch of a creative community too. Check out these formations I've encountered.

Supercell are friendly.

My boyfriend recently lost his phone and could not retrieve his village from anywhere since it wasn't synced. Though a bit delayed, they replied with in such an apologetic way and got everything back to him within a day. Fast and efficient. The support team even provided ample assistance, check ups and guided step-by-step all through just email. The only thing missing now is trying to get Free Gems from them. Tee Hee~

So, i think it's time to lay down and grab the iPod now.

CLASH OF CLAN FOREVER!

What is that in your mouth?

As it has been years,
You might not reappear,
Enclosed, vague and assaulted by the present,
Ashamed of victorious talks,
Which never made the walk,
Only exist as a burden for the present.

But burdens are a bidding,
An intangible emotion,
Hard to rid,
But burdens are no kidding,
An intangible emotion,
Hard to bid,
As it mocks and it dampens,
Aesthetics of the present.

What is that in your mouth?
Behind crooked teeth,
Answers that are unsheathe,
Crops the story short,
For the present and the burden the mind extorts.

Charitable.

It's that time of the year to collect some Pahala and chase good deeds! Ramadhan is back people!

I've always loved Ramadhan, the month of waiting for Raya. No, wait. The month filled with patience, virtue and selflessness is more like it. 

Which leads me to fill charitable. I have my vices and I know one which may be spending too much unnecessarily most of the time. Not a shopoholic, more of a spendaholic. So, what better ways to extend the nature of my habit into something that is more meaningful eventually is by being charitable. 

Of course, it is easy to donate clothes, sell preloved furnitures to others, give away expiring food before it's too late and pass RM10 to a lady who's conning the whole TTDI with tasteless RM8 burgers but being charitable does not end there. More than anything, it should start somewhere. It should come with effort and conscience. 

So I want to donate more than anything my capacity to those in need. Need to find who and what to help this season. 

Happy Sahur! 

Xx

Lost my touch in writing. Hell Na!

Okay, I need some motivation to start blogging.

So, I Googled "what to blog about". How creative right? In this social/digital media age, what can you NOT Google search? (I know what you pervs are thinkin!)

So, I found this list by Alexandra Franzen. Which is totally my style. I fill in the blank kind of list where I'm able to alter the specifics!

Imma just go ahead and copy it because I don't want to lose it ever! :P

## amazing alternatives to ____________-ing.

## creative ways to make your ____________ even better.

## lessons that have changed the way I ____________.

## mantras to help you survive ____________.

## of the most beautiful ____________ in the world.

## people who do ____________ better than anyone else.

## people who have shaped + inspired the way that I ____________.

## questions to ask yourself before you ____________.

## quotes to inspire you to ____________.

## reasons to fall head-over-heels in love with ____________.

## reasons to give ____________-ing another shot.

## reasons your ____________-ing plan isn’t working out.

## reminders for times when you feel like ____________-ing.

## simple ways to spruce up your ____________.

## songs that will make you wanna ____________.

## surprising places to find your next ____________.

## terrible mistakes I made while ____________-ing — and what I learned from each one.

## things I love about ____________.

## things I no longer believe about ____________.

## things most people don’t know about ____________.

## things that are making me feel totally ____________.

## things to consider before making a decision about ____________.

## things to do when you need a break from ____________.

## truths about ____________ I wish I’d known, ## years ago.

## ways to ____________ on a budget.

## ways to ____________ when you’re totally bored of all the usual ____________.

## ways to attract more ____________ into your life.

## ways to create more ____________ in the world.

## ways to have waaaaay more fun while you ____________.

## ways to simplify the way you ____________.

A behind-the-scenes tour of my ____________.

A can’t-mess-it-up checklist for your very first ____________.

Chop chop! ## things to do before it’s time for ____________.

Everything I know about ____________ I learned from ____________.

Good news! ## reasons to smile + be happy about ____________.

How I scored a chance to ____________. (And how it changed my ____________.)

How to ____________ even if you don’t think you’re “ready.”

How to ____________ like nobody’s ever ____________-ed before.

How to ____________ when everything totally ____________s.

How to ____________ when you’re a complete beginner.

How to ____________ without ruining anyone’s life. (Or your own.)

How to ____________ without spending a dime.

How to bounce back after a shocking + unexpected ____________.

How to choose the right ____________ for your ____________.

How to cope when ____________ doesn’t approve of your ____________.

How to get the most out of your next ____________.

How to have a conversation with your ____________ about ____________.

How to persuade your ____________ to help you ____________.

How to prevent ____________ from ever happening to you. (Or happening again.)

How to profoundly impress your ____________s, every time.

How to soothe your ego when nobody wants to ____________ with you.

How to spend less time doing ____________ (and make more time for ____________.)

How to transform your ____________ into a ____________.

I met my hero, ____________! Here’s what I learned.

My up-close-and-personal conversation with ____________.

Oops! You screwed up your ____________. ## ways to fix it.

Read this the next time you’re desperately longing for ____________.

Read this the next time you’re doubting your ability to ____________.

Read this the next time you’re ready to give up on ____________.

So, you gave ____________-ing a shot? Didn’t work out? ## things to try next.

So, you think you want to ____________? ## pieces of advice.

Terrified about ____________-ing? ## comforting words of advice.

The ____________ guide to ____________-ing.

The ## best decisions I ever made about ____________.

The #1 question that every ____________ asks me.

The #1 reason that nobody’s interested in your ____________. (Yet.)

The downside of ____________-ing — and how to do it differently.

The dark, deep, scandalous secret that ____________ wishes you knew about ____________.

The easiest, simplest, happiest way to ____________.

The last time I ever ____________-ed. (And why I’ll never do it again.)

The story of that one time I ____________-ed, and lived to tell the tale.

The surprising connection between ____________ and ____________.

The top ## ways to ____________.

Totally bored of ____________? ## things to try, instead.

Totally freaked out about ____________? ## reasons to rrrrelax.

Totally obsessed with ____________? ## things you’ll adore, even more.

What ____________ taught me about ____________.

What I tell myself when I really don’t feel like ____________-ing.

What it REALLY means to ____________.

What to wear to your very first ____________.

Why ____________ matters to me.

Why absolutely nothing is wrong with your ____________.

Why being ____________ is a surprisingly good idea.

Why I’m no longer satisfied with ____________ — and what I’m doing about it.

Why that terrible ____________ is actually a blessing.

Why there’s more than enough ____________ to go ’round.

Why we’re all desperately waiting for you to ____________.

Why you should get out of your own way and ____________ already.

And of course, here's a link to her blog. She's got a lot of inspiring contents too. I may have lingered a bit before I got to this post. Heh!

http://www.alexandrafranzen.com/2013/08/08/dont-know-what-to-blog-about/

Now which one should I pick first!

“夏は短い" by bawxxx I’ve always had this inclination to anything...

“夏は短い" by bawxxx

I’ve always had this inclination to anything Japanese since I was young. From finesse of culture and fun-quirky anything, in limelight or in shadows, they have the best of the best.

Well.. In my opinion, of course.

Hence the nickname Momochie that has latched on since high school. ;)

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Realization.

It puts a halt on your life when you realize that the person you hate for being immature in your past relationship, was actually the mature one. And you're still the kid in the relationship, either by choice or default.

Fudge.

If you cant commit, then compensate.

Just had to dictionary dot com the spelling of 'commit'. Keep getting temporary dyslexia on how to spell it. Double m double t no?

Anyways,

I always believe if you cant commit, compensate. No, you must compensate! Because if you dont even compensate your failed commitments, that just means your lazy.

So, in life, I go by this moto. Which leaves me to believe that I have so much compensating to do.....

Xoxo

Muh-muh-puh-ho-ar-gee.

Damn. Sudden addiction to RO2 is unproductive. 0_0

My I Just Need Cash.

Just thought that I had never written anything about my I Just Need Cash.

My beloved home business started off as a place the shopping addict (me) could sell off my preloveds which were hardly worn or infact, never. What came from a school sale idea transformed into an online business for me.

So in 2009, I started of I Just Need Cash, persevering through massive hype of online business culture at that time. But with good connections and support from not only closed ones but people i meet along the way. My business grew stable.

But I Just Need Cash took a terrible turn when due to bad timing and planning, no new ventures were made and persevering in the mass culture wasnt doing it. So in 2010, I put it on a long hiatus.

Now, we have a new business partner, my very good friend, Nina. Nina not only has been my true friend in worst times but has an excellent and sound logic when it comes to business. What reborned into the scene as still a prelove and women apparel online shop have now turned into a more wholesome retail.

We do not only supply Suprè, direct from Sydney, Australia. We even bring you respected brands from all parts of the world as we are jetsetters at heart! So travelling has also become a business opportunity to us. And most importantly, with the great blessing of Allah, Alhamdulillah, we are fortunate enough to travel. Now, we also have gone into venturing self-made products such as home decors and iphone cases. :) Our wall posters are even customized to customer's preferences. Great right?

Which concludes what I Just Need Cash is to me. A place for me to sharpen my business mentality but with good company.

Not a single day I do not thank the amount of support I get from those around me, those who strive with me and those who simply even come and visit me from time to time. :) life and work should stay this nice forever-but of course, this wont feed me and my future child, well i dont think so atleast. :P

Xoxo

Line of today.

"I'm scared if the bad things dont stop if the good things dont start.."

"What do you mean?"

"Like, God is unhappy with me."

"Then of course the good things need to come."

It's been so long.

Yellow.

It's been so long since I've written anything in this blog but I always feel sentimental when I'm about to delete it. Reading back, the blogs pretty interesting, till I filled it up full of woes through the last break up. Pfft. And I laugh about it now. - No, Really. A few dates and good friend times later, it didn't even matter. If only I could have written those depressing paragraph during my final reports. I would have scored just for word count. Ama-ha-zing!

K, so I decided I'm going to continue writing because at least blogging is a good way for more to stay grounded to the computer and practice my writing.

& I hope i graduate in November.

Tata!

We Malaysians love badminton too much, we get married to ‘em!

In the heart of London, around Euston and Camden, far and wide people come to play badminton. Every Sunday, a badminton meet is held at the Somers Town Community Sports Centre and interestingly, participation is dominated by Asian players who reside and are born in London. The organizer, 60 year old Malaysian, Suhaimi Idris has been organizing the meets for 20 years already. To begin, he had only played with 10 of his other friends.

“Today my club have 49 paid members. We do allow guests joining in but most of the guests are locals here,” said Suhaimi.

“Every year, the Malaysian embassy asks me to hold badminton tournament on their behalf because we are the only big Malaysian club, to celebrate Merdeka day.” Suhaimi continued. According to Suhaimi, every year, number of participants also increases. This year almost 60 participants joined the tournament. The tournament does not only limit itself to Malaysians, yet all races are welcomed. This is to encourage the concept of ‘muhibbah’ being promoted by the Malaysian Embassy.

For this couple, Badminton in London was their matchmaker indeed. Faris Fakri and Maisarah Sani, both 28 years old met in London through these Sunday meets. Faris was an accountant while Maisarah was a quantity surveyor. About a year before they dated, Faris had entered a tournament organized by Suhaimi and Maisarah was a regular member who found out about these sessions through the Malaysia Hall notice boards and that’s when the couple first set eye on each other.

“I was quite shy, I came with my brother and did not know anyone, even Suhaimi who invited me look like a Chinese and I did not acknowledge him only till a few months after.” Faris added. “People called him Atan over there” both Faris and Maisarah said simultaneously. “Faris had thought I was some typical ‘in the scene’ Malaysian student!” Maisarah joked when asked why they had not talked before. A year later, they dated after being partnered by Suhaimi in one of the Annual Merdeka tournaments.

According to Suhaimi, both had impeccable skills in Badminton. While Faris was once upon a time the state player for Kelantan, Maisarah was naturally just a sports enthusiast since young, despite the fact that her father was the former President of Squash Racquets Association Malaysia (SRAM). Both Faris and Maisarah were exposed to many sports but their hearts belong to the thrilling smashes of the badminton game.

“The best thing about badminton is that it takes only two to play and you’re good,” Maisarah commented. “Unlike football where you have to have a full team.” She continued

Now, both of them are back in Malaysia and married to each other. Currently, Maisarah is the proud owner of the Duduk Cafe and Faris runs his photography business under Faris Fakri Photography. Besides the fact that they met through a sport they enjoyed best, now both of them have resorted to doing what they love best as their future careers too.

To whoever who is recovering from a broken heart.

Today I realized that all the things I've done was a one step recovery from a broken heart.

I am not ashamed to admit that I've been depressed, dealing with rebounds, extremely spending my time on the outside world, neglecting my health, wealth, and everything that coincide, mistakenly fall flat and back up again a few times, shortchanged my decisions and recklessly living on the edge. Some parts, I've neglecting the people who were mostly there for me, my family and my close friends. I have lied, been in denial, saying that I'm over it when I'm not and I have made up stories to some, those who do not know the truth yet, to just mentally make myself feel a lot easier to breathe.

I admit that I'm tired trying to get over it, trying to heal it and trying to see where time goes with it, I'm tired of faltering on the drunken texts or stoned dialings and heck, a lot of embarrassing moments.

But the best part is, a big part of me feels like I do not regret anything or everything I did, do and doing. I admit to my mistakes and ponder on the possibilities and what ifs but truthfully, I think I've made pretty good decisions and said pretty nasty things that needed to be said and not sugarcoated anyways. So I am truly happy. Inside, although sometimes I wonder about the endless heartbreak I feel, I know my day and me as a person, is enough. I love myself.

Learning to love myself and what I do makes me appreciate life and people even more. Concerning to the epic break up of my life, I am not even That mad at my ex anymore. Might be said too early, I know, but I learn to understand that everybody changes and sometimes we don't agree on the same things anymore and we have to make different choices for our life. I just hope that the void and pain he gave me, would soon be replaced by better things in life, not necessarily a person, but just something better. And I just hope that one day when we talk, I wont feel like shedding a tear or falling helplessly in love with the old person I grew up with for those are nothing but beautiful memories.

We all don't need to cry over spilled milk, buy another bottle.
<3